Warped Isolation

Cars and me don't always get along... but somehow I have a full license!

2006-10-18T19:10:00.000-05:00

I'm not altogether sure I should have got my license today. Although, there is no part of the test that is marked on "How to fill your gas tank" I guess.

I took my G test this morning, after 4 years and 9 months worth of procrastination. Passed, with what I will call flying colours, because there is no percentage involved, but he only mentioned two things which I should not do, and they were really dumb oversights. (Not like that time I ran into a mailbox -- that was fun...)

I am especially proud of myself because I was driving a rental that I was only in possession of for 24hrs (actually, 24.5 hours, since I was late bringing it back.) Parrallel parking, therefore, was a challenge, but not an impossibility, as I so valiantly proved this morning at the ungodly hour of 9am. Actually, the test-time wasn't particularly early, but the getting-up early to practice in the freezing cold and darkness felt decidedly shitty, and I am very tired as a result. I also have a kink in my neck from checking my blindspots excessively. Seriously -- I got the cramp mid-way through the test and it has yet to go away.

But the reason I am not altogether sure I should have a license is the little adventure that I had at the gas station this afternoon, just before I brought the car back. I drive to the gas-station, already late because I got distracted by pretty things in the mall, pull in (thankfully on the right side) and have to wait forever for the people in front of me to fill up their apparently gigantic and completely empty gas tanks. Then, I pull up and get out of the car, swipe the card, pick up the gas nozzle thing, and go to open up the er...uh... the... door-that-covers-the-hole-where-the-gas -goes-into-the-tank(?) -- In the end, I'm pretty sure that is not the technical term, but whatever. Anyway, the point is -- I can't get it open. The thing wont pry open (I have 3 broken fingernails to prove it,) I tried pushing it in the vain hope that it would pop-open, no dice, and then I ('cause really, im not that much of an idiot) go into the car and search for a teeny button somewhere that will pop the thing. Can't find one. Do the pulling and the pushing again, knowing that some idiot is watching me in the cameras, is pissing his pants laughing, and will most likely put the thing up on Youtube. By this time the machine has started beeping at me, and has cancelled my order since it has been left alone so long, and I begin to problem-solve. Someone pulls up at the station behind me, and I am on the verge of asking the driver for help -- when I realize this guy is approximately 90 years old and is going to know less about a relatively-new Hyundai Accent than I do. So I go and get the owner's manual in the glove-box, and start flipping through it frantically -- they have advice on what kind of gas to use, but damned if I could find anything about how to open the door! I finally find the button, it was inside the car, in a very weird place, start filling the gas up, and get in and finally, thankfully get to drive away.

...Hah -- you think this is done, huh? Not enough humiliation for me yet, though.

I get halfway to the rental place before I look at the gas meter and see that actually the dial is not quite at full --shit-- they will charge me if I don't fill it to full! And so I drive BY the rental place and go to the next gas station, which is this totally ghetto one from the 1940's I swear to god, and is not even full-serve. I stoically start pushing random buttons, and get it to work after another 5 minutes of fumbling around. then I fill it up -- 2 whole dollars worth -- AND manage to get gasoline on my shoes! (I always thought it would be brown, for some reason, but it is definately clear.)

THAT is the end. Minus the part about the cashier laughing at me for a 2 dollar gas bill.

But that is just adding insult to injury.

Uhh. Oct. 17th 2006. (hows that for a title?)

2006-10-17T22:57:00.000-05:00

Well, today was a busy day. Full of class, and errands, and spending money, and homework, and parrallel parking.

I got myself the beginnings of a Halloween costume, and over 200 dollars worth of food, most of which will last me until December as it is non-perishable (thank god). I am going to be Batgirl, and I am very excited. This is big for me, because I don't usually take the opportunity that Halloween offers to girls: the option to dress as much as a prostitute as you like, with free licence. But I am this year! Well, sortof. I plan to have minimal skin showing. lol

Anyway, its midnight and I have a driving test tomorrow morning, so I don't know why I started this post. But at least I did -- it means that maybe I will get back on the horse, or the camel, or whatever, and continue posting. Which is a good thing. haha.

An hour and a half has never felt this long... except for yesterday.

2006-10-11T21:28:00.000-05:00

So there is no time like the present for blogging. I am sitting in a class that I have already (in essence) been to this week - and there is nothing worse than sitting through the same boring shit alll over again. Poor Mr. R, either he is just out of practice at teaching after a year's sabbatical, or, he spent that year using up the remainder of his faculties on the book he wrote, and is now completely senile.

See, the thing is that I have Prof. R for two very similar classes this semester. They are both Shakespeare classes (reading 13 of his plays this semester, oh joy.) So this overload of Shakespeare that has a worse consequence: Prof. R has the same "drama" introduction for both courses. So, I get to listen to him ramble (because he is the king of ramblings, digressions and wild tangents) about 'How to read plays' (as if in my 4th year of an honours language double major, I didn't know) 'How drama got started' (learned that in my 2nd year class with him) 'The stages of drama from ancient Greece on to Elizabethan England' (name dropping basically, Sophocles, Aristotle etc) 'The church's problems with theatre' .... etc....etc....etc...

over, and over, and over, and over and over...............................

Stuff has been beyond weird this year. I have never before started my "end of year" countdown in September. (Only 6 1/2 more months to go!)

Anyhow, the guilt is eating away at me. I think I look really fake because no one else but me is typing/writing, simply because we have all realised that notes to this would be useless, and so I look particularly suspicious (foolish) typing away.

Post-op.

2006-04-27T12:08:00.000-05:00

It's happened. I've oficially become my own special version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. I have isolated myself in my clock-tower (attic) with nothing but gargoyles (family) for company. I have no contact with the outside world (because I refuse to answer the phone or the door) except for my good friend Esmerelda (Rachel) who I once saved from... er... an evil priest guy.

So the thing got done yesterday, and I am just about the least happy kid on the block right now. My face has swollen to gigantic proportions, ice notwithstanding. Somehow, my face is actually rectangular in shape, and its so perfect it's slightly scary. Reminiscent of a perverted chipmunk, I'd say -- a cross between Simon and the regular types because of my glasses. I have a pic of myself, but I'm not going to post it -- yes, I am that hideous.

+

Dentists suck.

2006-04-19T14:25:00.000-05:00

The whole right side of my face is frozen and I keep accidentally biting my tongue. I also can't eat anything til the freezing is gone, which sofar has been 3 and a half hours, and coul take up to 7, and Ive only eaten a piece of bread all day and im fucking starving!

The worst part is that this was only a couple cavities.... My wisdom teeth are going to be SO MUCH WORSE! *sob*

2006-04-15T09:42:00.000-05:00

Hey mr. X...

2006-03-18T23:00:00.000-06:00

Man, I am such a baby.

I never thought I was such a baby, but I'm sitting here googling "fractures of the fifth metatarsal" and "foot surgery" and looking at x-rays where people have gotten screws put into their feet, and crying and generally being a big baby. It's weird, you know? I've had a looooooooong time to get used to the whole idea - it didn't come as a surprise when the SURGEON I was referred to said "you have to have surgery." Gee, no kidding. I don't know what I'm scared of more, someone cutting me open and putting screws into my foot, or not being able to walk for three months afterwards. I'm horrified at the thought of not being able to do anything for myself.

And it makes me feel bad that there are people out there who have to deal with being an invalid all the time. It makes me feel badly that Marissa is across the hall rolling her eyes at my fear because she had a curve in her spine and had to have a steel rod fused to her spinal cord.

The closest I've come to surgery is when I rode my bike into a ravine and smashed my face into rocks. I have to get stitches in my forehead and nose and mouth. I was staying at my aunt's house while my dad was having a "romantic weekend" with his girlfriend in some motel. When he drove me the 8 hours home to my mother's, I wouldn't get out of the car. mom says that I told her I was worried she wouldn't love me anymore 'cause I was ugly.

I can't even talk to anyone about any of this anymore. Marissa is sick of hearing about it, I know because she rolls her eyes if I say my foot is hurting me. Kate is more subtle but I'm sure she is as well, mostly though, I think it's that she doesn't know what to say, because there's nothing she can do. I can't talk to my mom because she doesn't understand why I'm worrying now and I don't even have a date for the surgery yet. She says I'm creating problems for myself. Secretly I think she just doesn't know what to say either. So, I get to tell you. through email, which you don't ever check anyway. haha. And when you do get it you won't know what to say either.

Anyway, I should get to bed...sorry for dumping on you.

'night

2006-03-15T23:14:00.000-06:00

Hey.... Shh... Apparently I feel like posting again.

It's halfway through March already, which means I haven't posted in... a very long time. I've had loads of adventures since I last posted -- got an appartment with a stranger whose dad knows my mom, found out I have to get surgery on my foot and be on crutches for 3 months, bought a tube top, got drunk for the first time since who knows when, had my computer stolen from me by evil Business Depot people for 3 whole weeks, had tests, and written papers, been to a play, and bought a new winter coat for 800% off -- it's been good. Stressful, a lot of the time, but good. I'm happy.

It's nice.

AHAHAH - awesome!

2006-01-28T08:36:00.000-06:00

Too funny:

Jaques Chirac tricked by Canadian hoax

Totally worth reading. hee hee. Canadians made a funny.

Random pics

2006-01-27T16:12:00.000-06:00

Here are two pics. One is of me with some random creepy mannequin's in the change-rooms at the Gap, and the other is my first "snowman" (very teeny) of the year. huh.

Fucking Conservatives..

2006-01-24T13:44:00.000-06:00

We may as well send a little invite over to Bush, saying we don't know how to run our country and wouldn't he like to do it for us?

^&(#@**@*$&^@$%!*(#!&@()*@#&)!(#)(*#!&!#*($@(*^!#^#!*(

Is that a real horse?!?

2006-01-21T23:44:00.000-06:00

Oh, the ordeal it was to get Kate on top of that horse. And, since it was metal, it was freeeaking cold!

As you can see, she couldn't quite maneuver herself onto the saddle, but somehow, people (?!?!) have still asked if it's a real horse.

We had a little more trouble getting me on the horse...

So much so, that it didn't quite happen the way we wanted it...

Climate change

2006-01-21T09:30:00.000-06:00

I hate how things are amuck with the world and nobody's paying attention......... First we get a ridiculously hot summer, now we are getting a ridiculously mild winter, and Europe is being hit with weather they haven't seen in a century!

Jan 19: Dozens die in Russian cold snap

Some 24 people have died of exposure in Russia as freezing winter temperatures plunged to minus 30C overnight.

Many schools and businesses are shut, electrical billboards turned off, cars were unable to start and trolley buses put out of action by snapped cables. [...]

Temperatures on Thursday were the lowest recorded on the date of 19 January since 1927, weather forecasters said. [...]

Jan 21: Great Russian Freeze Spreads

Severe cold weather gripping large parts of Russia has now spread west, causing chaos in Ukraine, Belarus, the Baltic states and Scandinavia.

Officials in those countries say there is growing pressure on energy supplies, with power shortages as Russia cuts deliveries to fight the freeze at home.

[...]

Belarus recorded its lowest temperatures in 100 years

In other developments:

Six people died in Latvia, where temperatures of -27C were recorded, the lowest in 100 years, AFP news agency reports

Heavy snowfalls, high winds and cold cause problems across northern Europe, causing major disruptions to transport and power supplies

Flights from Copenhagen airport in Denmark were suspended for two hours on Friday evening as aircraft were de-iced. Traffic is not due to return to normal until Sunday

Thousands of motorists are stranded as the Store Baelt bridge connecting Copenhagen with the central island of Fyn is closed

In the Norwegian Arctic city of Tromso more than 20,000 people are left without power after heavy snow brings down electricity cables.

New cold

Five more people died overnight in Russia's capital, Moscow, bringing the total number of dead across the country since Tuesday to more than 70.

I want this shirt:

2006-01-19T19:01:00.000-06:00

So if any of you feel like getting me exactly what I want? For ANY occasion in the past present or future--

You can get me this shirt.

Don't even try to think of something on your own, it won't work. Just get me the shirt.

Please?

First day of Placement:

2006-01-16T06:18:00.000-06:00

.
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I think I'm going to barf.
.
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.
.

Terrence and Sheila, sitting in a tree...

2006-01-15T18:06:00.000-06:00

K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

Can't you tell my homemade Xmas gift was a hit? (Terrence is the monkey, by the way.)

Blarg.

2006-01-15T12:34:00.000-06:00

I didn't sign up for this, I hate strikes. Crossing picket lines is profoundly uncomfortable.

To all Lakehead University Education students who are doing volunteer
work , internship hours 3239 YA , or practicuum work (Ed 3499, Ed 4499)

Please read the advisory sent to professional teachers in the Lakehead
Public School system re: the Educational Assistant Strike which is
scheduled to begin Monday, January 16th.

Here are your guidelines:
You are to cross picket lines to complete scheduled course work.

Honour the information picket. Be courteous in listening to or
accepting any print materials that striking members are distributing.

If you are doing volunteer work not related to a course this is a
personal decision you must make.

Please heed the cautions to staff about not doing any work that would
normally be done by an Educational assistant. If you are not sure ask
the teacher you are working with & or the principal of the school.

Regards
Linda

2006-01-14T20:51:00.000-06:00

I think my head my explode and rocket off into another dimension. Migraines are the bain of my existence. Shit, the keyboard keys clicking is giving me facial spasms.

Over and Out.

Republicans for Voldemort

2006-01-13T21:28:00.000-06:00

http://www.goats.com/archive/030808.html

Er.. Not a comic I actually read (I dont do talking chickens, so much,) but the joke has definite merit.

Holy Shit..

2006-01-13T11:39:00.000-06:00

The skirt I wore to the bar last night was shorter than my hair.

By five inches.

(Does not belong to me.)

More on this after I've agonized over this uncharacteristic behaviour.

If I can find the guts.

2006-01-11T14:30:00.000-06:00

K, well, stubbing your toe hurts alot. So does having the hiccups. However, what does not suck, is that I bought my ticket home for Reading week, AND I got an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon for that week, in Guelph. Wheee!

Fucking Administration.

2006-01-10T18:23:00.000-06:00

So our school paper had some interesting news for me. Of course, first I found out from Karin, the VP of student affairs for our student union, whose gopher/bitch I was during orientation. What a fucking mess. Everyone is carrying the Argus around, it might improve their readership, at least. I don't know if my marks have been affected yet.

As Lakehead Education students returned from holiday break, they were looking forward to starting out a new semester stress-free. Many of them however, have been thrown a curve ball. It seems that many have had their marks changed from what had been originally posted on Web Advisor. In some cases, the drop was as low as 1 or 2 percent in an over all mark. In other cases, there was a drop of more than 18 percent overall.

“My multicultural mark had dropped from a 97 to a 79%,” says Adrianne Ciccone a student in her professional year. “Basically…I had perfect on the assignments, perfect on my paper and 97% on the final exam. A few weeks later when I went back to check if I had any other marks posted, it said that I got 12/25 on my paper, a failing mark.”

Ciccone is not alone. Kara Benka, who graduated from Lake Superior State University in Sault, Michigan with a 3.7 GPA, had a similar experience. “I went from 25/25 to 12/25. There is no way that I failed that paper.” Benka had an 84% but is now receiving a 79%. “I couldn’t believe the number of people that if affected. I thought it was just me until I came back and found out that it was everybody. It astonished me” says Benka

[...]

Students feel lost as to where to go with these complaints. Many have stated that administration sends them to their professors and instructors, while the instructors are also sending many students directly to administration.

Benka emailed her instructor regarding her marks and her email was forwarded on the Chair. She has yet to hear back from either regarding what action is to be taken with the discrepancies in her case.

According to several students, they were told by some professors and instructors that the marks had been sent back by the Chair of the Undergraduate Studies, Dr. Juanita Epp, for being too high. Sources indicate that instructors were ordered to lower class marks by administration. Dr. Epp says otherwise.

This year, the education department introduced a new method of assessing students’ progress throughout a course. It is called a holistic rubric and is also used in Ontario at the elementary and secondary school level. The standard students are expected to meet, according to Dr. Epp, is a Level 3: 70% to 79% (B- to B+). A level 4 is 80% to 100% (A- to A+), and is considered exceptional.

Dr. Epp says, that as with all faculties, marks must be signed off by the chair before becoming official. Since the introduction of the rubric however, a new approach is being taken. Rather than the individual chair signing off on the grades, the marks are now being reviewed by a committee made up of all the chairs in the faculty and the dean of education.

“We did this as a committee. All the marks that were in this exceptional category. We said there’s something wrong with this marking scheme. Because everyone can’t be exceptional,” explains Dr. Epp. “And then we would say could you have a look at these and look at the rubric and see how and why this is the way it is. Now some people, when we went back to them, were able to write a very cogent letter that said that this is why all these marks are the way they are, this is the evidence based background on how I reached this and there is absolutely no way that these aren’t terrific, terrific students.” Other instructors and professors resubmitted marks.

According to Dr. Epp, mark inflation is a problem in all education programs across the province. “If you’ve ever been to convocation in the last 10 years, everybody who walked across as a B.Ed graduate, not everybody, but 90% came out with first class standing. So we’d been receiving complaints and confusion and so on and so we decided to look at this to find out what the issue was,” said Dr. Epp.

The Faculty of Education brought in Dr. Robert Crocker, from Memorial University of Newfoundland, who according to Dr. Epp is an international expert on assessment, to do an evaluation of the processes used.

“We as a faculty took his report and examined it and tried to figure out how we could respond in an intelligent and evidence based way, to what the process was. And this [rubric] is what came out of it. Essentially, we had asked all faculty and all faculty had agreed to this, to look at how they did their assessment practices to make sure their assessment practices fit this rubric process,” said Dr. Epp.

Education Student Teachers' Association President Matthew Chater and Lakehead University Student Union Vice President, Student Issues Karen Bailey are hoping to work with students and administration to come to an understanding of what has happened and actions that are going to be taken. Chater hopes to address students sometime next week. Both Bailey and Chater encourage students to talk to them regarding this issue.

To appeal grades in any course, the first step is to approach the professor/instructor, then the chair of the department and finally the dean of the faculty. After that process, if students are still not satisfied, they can approach the University’s Ombudsperson, Armand Colosimo. Students have the right to question their grades and to ensure that they are being assessed fairly. Students are reminded to document everything when going through the appeals process.

This is not something I needed on my plate right now. And, to top things off, the referral to the orthopedic surgeon could take from 6 months to a year. Anyone want to sledgehammer my foot for me? If I am bleeding and have more than one broken bone, maybe they will fix me.

ARGH.

A+++++++++

2006-01-08T22:27:00.000-06:00

Alright, so Andrew Adamson get maaaaaaaaaaaaaajor kudos for The Chronicles of Narnia. Bloody well done, mate! It was excellent, and all fears of it ruining the book were thankfully unfulfilled. It was better in my head, like it always is, but there was no ruinage whatsoever, it was an excellent interpretation. I give it major points for that. Now that it has my stamp of approval, go out and see it -- now!!

PS -- I really want Susan's green dress. In a non-kid size.
PPS-- Whoever thought up Queenie's dress... sucks. Baaad shoulders.
PPPS -- I have a crush on Tumnus.
PPPPS -- And Liam Neeson's voice. *drool*

Aww...

2006-01-08T14:02:00.000-06:00

Err...

2006-01-06T21:12:00.000-06:00

Found a new comic. slash blog. It's bizarre... but oddly compelling. Felt takes on a wholeeeeee new meaning.

Feltup.org

New Glasses:

2006-01-05T21:09:00.000-06:00

Nice, huh? I thought so. My ears are buzzing. I went to the bar tonight -- first time since... October? It wasn't so bad, they played mostly okay music, and I got to hear Since You've Been Gone" without even requesting it, even though it was a crazy remix. AND I heard "Home for a Rest" for the first time in ages.. I'm guessing 1st year university, which means 2 years ago. It was cute, Lena still called it "my song." She remembered. :) And I still knew allllll the words.

New Years post..a little late.

2006-01-04T16:17:00.001-06:00

Christmas break, this year, was choc-full of thinking. Between spending a week painting a room alone, lonely walks (sometimes a result of temper tantrums), loads of time spent not watching bad movies, trying (unsuccessfully, mostly) to explain what I’ve been up to, to people I haven’t seen in months, and long car rides, I’ve had lots of room for introspection.

Now, whether or not this is the result of watching Bridget Jones’ Diary one too many times, or whether I have delusions that I actually am Carrie from Sex and the City, my deep-thinking usually ends up being something of an internal monologue, a first draft let’s-say, of what’s become this blog. Now, you may or may not have noticed that year two of Warped Isolation has been somewhat lacking in its material, which is something that I tend to think about when I realize that I am monologue-ing in that way.

So what’s happened?

Well, it’s not that my life is too boring to write about -- lots has happened, and when lots
wasn’t happening, well, I’ve written about nothing more times than I can say, so that can’t be a reason. [At the very least, 2005 was filled with enough Bush-screw-ups to keep me busy for months.]

Is it because Warped Isolation has gotten me into trouble with people a bit, for sometimes indelicate posts? Do I feel the cold hand of censure on my shoulder every once in awhile? Partly, perhaps. I know for sure that there are those who have knowledge of this blog that I really would rather they didn’t, and that fact has left me stymied in my writing more than once. Mostly because they have and continue to hurt me and my family, and I don’t want to let it show. It’s hard to be glib about serious things when one is sitting alone at the computer and working through the tangle of issues that everyone has in a hatbox underneath their desk. [Or that’s where I keep mine, anyway.]

On the other hand it’s equally, if not more, difficult to be serious about what you are feeling when you know that there are people watching, and that you will have to take ownership of these issues somewhere other than behind the security blanket that is a computer monitor.

Clichèd though it is, I’m now staring at a crossroads.

Straight ahead says: I’m sorry guys, forgive me for being un-forthcoming with what’s been happening, let me catch you up.

Backwards says: Fuck you. If you’re not happy, read year one again. ;)

Right turn says: It is what it is, I’m not sorry, but I am aware. I’ll try to do better in the future. Maybe.

Left turn says: For me, the era of blogs is over. It is clearly not serving any other purpose than frustrating, boring or angering me. Read the paper instead.

Clearly I’ve taken the time to think all these options through, and I’ve found I’m incapable of making a decision. Let’s make a compromise, shall we? I’ll let you guys know that I’m thinking of shutting down the factory, give us some time to mull it over. And in the meantime, we can have a re-cap of the year’s going’s-ons in the lovely, lazy, point-form slash pro/con format. Let’s see if this is ambiguous enough for everyone.

Pros:
- Fell in lurve (?!)
- Did well in school
- Took some books off my to-read list: Harry Potter 6, Atlas Shrugged, The Da Vinci Code, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, The Picture of Dorian Grey, The Favorite Game, Cat’s Cradle.
- Got an excellent summer job
- Made 6 excellent new friends at that job.
- Realized that it makes me warm and tingly inside when people call Martini my Step-dad.
- Got a scholarship

Cons:
- Fell out of lurve. It hurts. Especially after I realized how much I had invested in it.
- Realized I have itchy feet again, want out of T.Bay
- Blew my budget to hell over Xmas. And myself. Just a little.
- Learned how to miss people. That hurts too.
- Got really frustrated with my faculty at school.
- My mother is still not divorced.
- Jim became a psychotic asshole who hurts everyone he’s supposed to love.
- Realized that marriage is a failed institution and that I may actually end up a spinster cat-lady like I’ve always threatened. Only without the cats.
- Figured out I no longer belong anywhere.
- Got sick of people I was supposed to be friends with.
- Broke a bone in my foot, that may or may not be possible to heal -- this year, or ever.

Have a Happy New Year everyone, I know I’ll try my best.
xoxo
Rae

[ PS-- I'll email the people Im supposed to email when I get a goddamn minute ]

Ooh, nice...

2005-12-28T16:20:00.000-06:00

Yay, I got really good marks! Go me!

Now, who says marks don't go up during the registrar's holiday? Tolllllllld youuuuuuu!

My Apologies

2005-12-28T15:21:00.000-06:00

Roses are red,
Violets are blue
If you hadn't known I'd left Guelph, well,
Now you do.

Soooooooo sorry to those of you that I didn't get to see over the holidays. 3 cities is too many to juggle, I think. (and get this -- my mother wanted me to visit my OTHER gran in Ottawa too!)

It doesn't mean that I don't love you all dearly, because even the people I got to see, I would really much rather have gotten to see more of. (Court especially geyts apologies, since I had to leave her sweater in her mailbox 5 minutes before I left town.)

Hugs to all of you, and hope to see you Spring Break!

xoxo
Rae

Visit with the Fam.

2005-12-21T19:46:00.000-06:00

Alright, so here is me with Shawnessey, my cousin, who was born a year ago yesterday. We raced to Windsor for her birthday party after Nathan and Anthony got out of school, and we just made it for cake and presents -- One year olds go to bed early, you know.

She's gorgeous, and I'm contemplating (well, not really, though its a nice thought) dropping out of school so that I can be her nanny. She is the sweetest, most adorable girl I've ever met -- and like her mum says: "I'm not biased" not at all. She really is.

We read Cat in the Hat today, and Clifford the Big Red Dog. I also got to feed her her mixed vegatables, made by Heinz, which looked very much pre-chewed. Loads of bonding happened, I only hope it lasts through til who knows the next time I get to see her. Anyhow, I need to get going, Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good night.

xoxox

Icky Cherubs

2005-12-14T21:27:00.001-06:00

So these are them, the ugly naked baby things that were on the border in my mother's dining room.

It always amuses me that the person who owned the house before my mum was an interior decorator.

To put it mildly... I would never hire her.

Uh, this is supposed to be an Xmas BREAK?

2005-12-13T11:18:00.000-06:00

Stripping wallpaper is the bane of my existence. In fact, decorating is the bane of my existence. I don't know how Debbie Travis does it. I would shoot myself in a week if I had to put up with all this shit.

I (stupidly) told my mother I would help paint the dining room of her house-- mostly because is it currently a putrid pink colour with a wallpaper border of these ugly cherubs that in actual fact look like pedophilic old men. I don't mind helping, but I have found myself very alone for the past two days, first clearing the room, and now de-wallpapering it.

I've also been enlisted by my mother's boss (suddenly Im a servant out for hire in Guelph) against my will (my mom said I had to do it) to animal/house sit for her. Now, I have nothing against animals, but I certainly have never had the responsibility of pets, my mother being allergic, and my responsibility for the cats that my father had being very minimal because I only saw him every other weekend. So I show up to the lady's house, and she hands my two pieces of foolscap chock-filled with instructions for her two birds, her cat, and her dog. Oh -- and did I mention that the cat has arthritis and the dog needs eyedrops twice a day?

YUCK.

I took the dog for a walk yesterday ("she needs a very VIGOROUS walk twice a day, Rae, and if you miss one, make the other longer, blah blah blah") and when I realized I had to scoop the poop, I freaked out. And then got my mother to do it (she IS helping with that) and the smell made me gag and almost barf ANYWAY. And then when we got in and it was time to feed them, everyone started circling me, the cat was whining the dog was barking the birds were twittering and being obnoxious... And I felt like mothers must feel when their kids are all like "what's for dinner? What's for dinner? ew, I don't like that, can I have something else?"

It was traumatizing, and made me realize that I will never be able to own a dog, or have children, without throwing a skillet at somebody really REALLY fast.

I now sympathize with Julianne Moore in The Hours more than I can possibly say.

Thank god feminism happened.

Poor whales...

2005-12-12T09:05:00.000-06:00

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/4520104.stm

SP Character Quiz:

2005-12-12T08:45:00.000-06:00

which member of something positive are you?

quiz created by heatherbat

Orthopedic News:

2005-12-08T15:18:00.000-06:00

*Ahem*

An oblique type of fracture is present peripherally at the base of the fifth metatarsal and the fracture margin appears corticated, indicating delayed or non healing of this fracture. There is slight displacement. No other bone or joint abnormality identified.

In other words, a little piece of bone broke off and is currently floating (maybe floating is the wrong word... add 'PAIN' to the definition, and you've got the gist of it) around in my right foot, while I have been walking on it for going on 7 months.

Pictures below.

Can you find it?

Here it is!

2005-12-04T18:06:00.000-06:00

Pretty sky.

ALRIGHT!

2005-12-01T19:24:00.000-06:00

So how about the template change? Betcha most of you thought you'd come to the wrong site - huh? Especially those of you who know how much I abhor pink. Ah well, I needed a change that will let me appreciate the nice old template. Ill change it after enough of you complain, or I feel like I want to puke.

^_^

And so it starts...

2005-11-28T21:53:00.000-06:00

Alright, so here goes.

Spent the weekend writing (or trying to write, I wasn't too pleased with the result) a final paper. Finished it 9 minutes before I handed it in this afternoon, and I walked into class late, to boot. Tomorrow I have an in-class essay in one class and I get a take-home exam in the other, which I have absolutely no guidelines for, in a class that I have no confidence in, mostly because the prof taught in a non-traditional, indescribably New-Agey and flighty way. I actually like her, but have a shaky understanding of the course at best, as a direct result of her teaching methods. I get until right after the weekend to do that, then (or while im working on that) I have to madly read, re-read, or finish, (depending on the text,) all of my course material in preparation for the exams. Then I get to re-write notes for the classes, and then I get to take the exams and go home.

All in... 11 days.

Worst part is I don't feel like I have another essay in me, and I have this incredible urge to try working at McDeath's to stave off insanity. Or accelerate it. Whichever comes first. Somehow, I don't think dropping out of school with say, 28,000 odd dollars worth of debt and no employable skills would be a good idea. So lets all hope I do well on my exams or someone had better get me a refrigerator box and a ticket to someplace where bums don't freeze to death during wintertime for Christmas, so I can live my homeless schizophrenic life in peace.

Success!

2005-11-26T17:51:00.000-06:00

Before:
After:

2005-11-23T19:41:00.000-06:00

So it's -17 degrees celcius out there tonight, that's 1 degree Fahrenheit, for you Americains, with 33 km an hour winds (22mph) which makes it feel like -29 degrees celcius. And to think this morning it was 0 degrees with 4km winds. So it felt like 0 degrees.

Things I love about this morning:

2005-11-23T08:05:00.000-06:00

1. I woke up on my own, pre-alarm. And I'm not tired either.
2. I woke up to a foot of snow on the ground
3. The boys next door (my heroes,) shoveled.
4. I'm listening to Christmas music (so call me crazy.)

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

The Saddest Bet

2005-11-23T00:03:00.000-06:00

This is the story of the saddest bet I've ever won.

Once upon a time, there were three girls who were very good friends and stuff. Then they all went to university: Sheila went to Ottawa to be a nurse, Rae went to the frozen North to be a teacher, and Rachel stayed at home because it was free and she didn't know what she wanted to do.

Sheila and Rae kept in very good touch, considering Sheila is very bad at that sort of thing. They alternated when they would call each other: on week Rae would call Sheila, and the next week, Sheila would call Rae. Rachel never kept in touch with anybody because she has AD(H?)D. Sometimes even Rae and Sheila got busy, and they missed a week, but they would always make up for it. And they got to see Rachel at Christmas and Thanksgiving.

Then one day Rae didn't get a phone call from Sheila. She shrugged her shoulders and went about her week, hoping Sheila wasn't too too busy. Or hungover. Then the next week rolled around and still there was no call. This time Rae hoped she didn't have strepthroat like Kate did, because she heard it was moving its way across the province. The next week came and stil no call, Rae debated leaving nasty messages on Sheila's machine, but decided it took too much effort and ate some cake instead. The fourth week Rae couldn't help asking herself if Sheila had died in a freak nursing accident involving bedpans and old men, and whether or not she should call her mother, but wrote an email instead. (The reason she hand't done so previously is that Sheila is largely computer illiterate.) And the email got a teeny response that said "ill call you tomorrow."

And then she never did.

Sheila finally called that weekend. For 5 minutes. Just so she could say "I don't really have time to talk, but I will call you on tuesday."

"Hahaha. As if," I replied "you'll call me when you land back at home and want to see me at Christmas."

"No I won't," she responded "don't be so cynical, I will call you tuesday, I promise. I'm offended at your lack of faith. blah blah blah blah"

It is now 12:02 and she still has not called. She won't either.

This is the saddest bet I have ever won.

--Also, slamming your index finger in a door hurts. a lot. --

The weekend

2005-11-20T23:54:00.000-06:00

So the weekend is over, already, and I spent most of it in front of a computer writing a paper.

Man, was it ever scintillating.

At least I have it done, and I don't think I suffered any permanent damage from the heart attack I received when I thought my entire paper got lost, 14 hours before I was to turn it in. I think it's actually a good paper too, especially considering I still have 40 pages of the book that I have yet to read. I still have to work on the Children's lit group work assignment due tomorrow afternoon, but that is fairly straight-forward, and I should be able to do it on my lunch break.

I can't wait to spent the rest of the week studying for a test, and writing a paper for next Monday, (same prof! All three papers!) which I will also be spending the weekend writing.

And theeeen, I get to write an in-class essay, turn in the horrible painting I did for a "creative project" (Have I mentioned I've never painted anything before in my life? Well, since kindergarten. But this is oils -- ack!) and start studying for my exams. Which basically means re-reading notes and textbooks so that I can write 7 essays in a week. Yay for being an English/French major!

Ah well, to sleep I think. I have to wake up to go hand in this stupid paper, otherwise I would sleep through my class tomorrow morning.

I didn't get a weekend, after all.

2005-11-19T00:07:00.000-06:00

hee hee. Fun times. Major snowfall tonight, so everyone is outside having a gigantic snowball fight.

Inside, knitting a scarf for someone who doesn't read this blog but would if I wrote their name (Murphy's law, you see) I hear the mad frolicking, get jealous, notice Matt outside with a huge rip in his vest, not 10 feet from my door and so I run to the backdoor, grab a snowball, lock the door, opemn the front door, whip it at him, miss, and get picked up off the ground, carried outside in pj's and barefoot, only to be covered in snow.

I love winter :)

For want of a better post...

2005-11-17T00:52:00.000-06:00

So does anyone have any advice for someone whose face is peeling off?

Like, seriously? Because my face is literally peeling away. Honestly, one of the most disgusting things I've ever experienced. Like what happens on your back after you get a sunburn... only on my face. What a disaster.

The worst part is that I don't know what to do to fix it. The problem is dry skin, and I don't know where to start with that really. Although my family has a history of dry skin, excema, etc.. I have only ever had excema behind my ears, and that was mostly when I was a kid, I get it very rarely now. And here my face starts peeling off.

Its not like I can just moisturize either, since my face like to get pimply if I do that. ick.

I need to find a paper bad to wear over my head. or learn to live with acne. or peeling. shiat.

2005-11-14T21:12:00.000-06:00

Just to get us all in the Christmas spirit and all, since it is mid-November!

Let it Snow

2005-11-10T00:40:00.000-06:00

This is it guys, this is the first snowflake of the year. Simple, beautiful (I think,) and made all the better because I have not made one of these for an entire season. I’m proud of it because of that – sometimes I forget how to make them, and end up cutting them in half. Not this year though, this year my hands remembered how to fold and cut the paper.

I was once approached by a man in a square in Montmartre, and he began talking to me as he cut a piece of paper, quickly, deftly, like an artist. It wasn’t until he had unfolded the piece of paper that I saw that what he had been cutting, (and all this in under 40 seconds,) was the bust of a young woman with her hair up in a ponytail, wisps of hair flying around, and a pair of glasses perched on her nose. Now, this wasn’t me, I assure you the cutting had a regal chin and an upturned nose – neither of which I have, but the accomplishment was still mind-boggling for a girl who can’t cut a straight line even if you draw one for her on the piece of paper.

15 Euros, he said. 15? 15 Euros for a piece of paper? The idea was absolutely ludicrous, and Mandy, my friend, began tugging on my sleeve to lead me away. Maybe it was his ridiculous compliments and the fact he dropped the price to 10 Euros – for the lovely Canadian, only – but I can still remember his hands holding those scissors while he snipped away, all the while looking at Mandy and I as he was doing it.

Whatever the reason, I bought the cutting.

It seems funny that I chose to focus on this man while I was surrounded at the time, by an entire squadron of artists, easels set up and painters at work. Funny that though I didn't buy the painting I had wanted for my sister, (they were too expensive!) I dug deep into my (shallow) pockets to pay 10 Euros for a piece of paper the size of my palm. And took a picture of the artists, instead.

Wake-up Call

2005-11-06T19:27:00.000-06:00

I've gotten into the habit of waking up, violently smacking the alarm clock into submission, and stumbling to the window to see if Thunder Bay has been beset by snow yet. I don't even put on my glasses, I just wrench open the blinds and if my eyes detect colour, then I can close the blinds and make my way to the shower satisfied.

This habit got me into trouble a couple days ago. Friday morning I wake up to an intruding sound:

*beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep* *beep*

(I would have to keep that up for another twenty minutes for it to be accurate on the annoyance-scale.)

I look to the clock and shove my head under the pillow, mentally grumbling about having 40 more minutes to sleep and asking myself how long it takes for a truck to back up anyway. 1o minutes later, ready to pull my hair out at the annoying sound, I jump out of bed at the thought that the noise could be a bloody SNOWPLOW and as usual, wrench open the blinds. This morning I don't stumble to the shower satisfied. THIS morning, I open the blinds to find a guy a foot from my face, cleaning out the gutter of my house, in one of these:

I swear to god I have never ran to the bathroom so fast in my life. All I remember is this plaid-clad guy laughing his ass off at the look on my face.

And there was snow on the ground, to boot.

Just so you know...

2005-10-31T23:03:00.000-06:00

Some people were wondering whether I had blocked them on my msn. Now, considering one of those people was Kate, I took it seriously, decided to post this -- this being a message saying no, I (most likely, I'm not saying I've never blocked or deleted anyone,) have not blocked or deleted you, I am just going through some crap right now and am being above and beyond anti-social.

so don't worry about it..

just leave me be, otherwise my usually hidden violent tendencies will turn into latent ninja rage.

Oh yeah, and Happy Halloween.

Wonder drug!

2005-10-28T21:41:00.000-05:00

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Now you too can look THIS GOOD, for only 89.99! Flab-aloss is FABULOUS!

disclaimer: Flab-aloss is a weight loss product, and can not be held responsible for any weight gain induced by eating, intravenous support or alcoholism. As with any weight-loss product, it is only a supplement to healthy eating and exercise.

One tired duck...

2005-10-27T21:43:00.000-05:00

You are looking at one tired duck.

Now, you may be asking yourselves:

"Why duck? Why are you so tired that you are sleeping in the middle of the day?"

And I would turn over and mumble something like: "piss off, I need some sleep."

And most likely, (depending on how well you know me, of course) you would say:
"It's two O'clock in the afternoon, deal with a little friendly conversation."

Or, the more polite members of you might just ignore my rude comment and say

"Is it because you had a lot of assignments due this week? Did you have any tests to worry about? Were you working very hard?"

And, I would be forced to answer "no" to every single one of these questions, because otherwise, I would be lying. I had nothing really to do this week, and yet I still managed to skip a yoga class, (I think I watched the Food Network instead,) shirk the homework I was suppose to be getting ahead on, skip one class so I could sleep in, and consciously gave up an A+ for an A, because I was too lazy to do the extra assignment it would take.

Also, tonight may just be a night I go to bed at 10pm. Go me.

I think it has something to do with the fact that all of my busy-ness has caught up with me and I'm just crashing because I don't have any of the adrenaline I have when I'm stressed out. Hopefully though, I get it back soon, since next week is the week from hell, including 6 tests in as many days (yes, there is a test on a saturday - joy,) and if I feel as crappy and tired, and emotional as this week, I may just decide to become a bag lady who lives in a refrigerator box. Or worse, a reject who lives in their mother's basement and works at Taco Bell.

I needed a laugh, thought I would share:

2005-10-24T21:04:00.000-05:00

(Click for big)

http://www.youdamnkid.com

when friendly banter goes wrong..

2005-10-24T18:31:00.000-05:00

Uh..........................

I'm at a loss here. When "friendly banter" ends in "this is tiresome, im going to go and get some work done." That's bad, right? The sinking feeling doesn't bode well, does it?

Shit.

Fuck.

This is too hard. I give up.

Crap 18th C homework

2005-10-23T19:09:00.000-05:00

Oh look! I've found the perfect paragraph to exemplify the novel Moll Flanders to you all.

"Then it occured to me what an abominable creature I am! And how is this innocent gentleman going to be abus'd by me! How little does he think, that having divorc'd a whore, he is throwing himself into the arms of another! that he is going to marry one that has lain with two brothers, and has had three children by her own brother! one that was born in Newgate, whose mother was a whore, and is now a transported thief; one that has lain with thirteen men and has had a child since he saw me (ie. she went on vacation after getting engaged, got married to another man, got pregnant, extended the vacation, and now plans to marry this guy) poor gentleman!"

Keep in mind, also, that this is page 144 and the novel is 300 pages long, and she does not stop getting into trouble for a long, long while yet.

The joys of Scrabble...

2005-10-21T13:44:00.000-05:00

You know, a picture is supposed to be worth a thousand words -- and if you look at this picture, (which has at least 20,) I think you will begin to understand the fun we had after we stopped playing by the rules.

My personal favorites are ARATULAQUERHONE and BIGOTY (Not Bigot, not Bigoted, not Bigotry... Bigoty.)

What NOT to Wear: Cat-ear girl edition

2005-10-19T22:10:00.000-05:00

So there is this idiot in my Children's lit class that annoys the hell out of me. She is obnoxious, always comes in late, interrupts the prof to share her very unenlightened and unasked for opinions, and dresses like she is on crack. She has worn cat-ears on more than one occasion, and is just generally poorly dressed all of the time. I feel like sikking Clinton and Stacy on her. I was inspired by her outfit today, to draw you a picture. Let us all pretend we are in front of the 360 degree mirror, shall we? (Can you be "in front" of a 360 degree mirror?)

Now, as you can see, this girl needs some help. Legwarmers on her arms, a lacy black slip over jeans, a cat-ear toque? It's appalling. And to top it all off, when she put on her outdoor-clothes to brave the weather at the end of class, I saw her pulling a grey leopard print scarf out of her bag. Notice that the top and the shoes are un- coordinated, baby pink shoes and a bold pink turtleneck. At first glance I thought the goggles were actually cats-eye glasses, but I was wrong.

Do you think she had a seizure while she was getting dressed this morning? Because I almost suffered one from looking at her.

Yoga BREAKTHROUGH!

2005-10-19T20:05:00.000-05:00

Alright, woo! (So much for apathy, it lasted a whole two days)

So yoga tonight was friggin awesome! I get there and find that Linda (my regular instructor) has hurt her foot, isn't here because she's hurt her foot and had to go get x-rays. (Sounds like she's a little prompter at these things than I am, perhaps?) But that's not why it was awesome. Ok, well, I do like Jenn (the fill-in) better than Linda, so I suppose it's part of what made it awesome. But was really made it awesome was that I got totally into some postures that I couldn't get into before! It was like a whole new threshold of duck-flexibility!

Now, any of you who know anything about yoga will know that in a downward-dog, the goal is to eventually get the heel of your feet and your forehead touching the ground. Like so: (well, almost like so -- she can't touch her head yet, but im sick of googling)

Unfortunately, I still can't do that, I look sorta like her only my heels are slightly off the ground. HOWEVER, when you do your foreward bend before you are just about to go into downward -dog you want to bend at the hips, keeping the back and legs straight, and putting the palms of your hands straight down on the mat so you can jump backwards to go into plank. Now this, ladies and gentlemen, is something that I accomplished for the very first time, tonight! (Among other things, but we're not getting into that since it would take forever, I'm that awesome.)

Usually I even have issues touching my toes with my fingers, let alone getting the palms of my hands on either side of my foot - but tonight I did it! woot!

So you all better be proud of me so that I'm not the only one.

Oh, and there is something else I am compelled to share with you, just because I didn't particularly want to know, so I'm going to share around so we can all not want to know:

My instructor has a brazillian. Also, she does yoga sans underwear.

lurrrrrrvely, I know.

Hey, don't blame me, you kept reading!

2005-10-19T08:39:00.000-05:00

I've been contemplating writing this post for the past couple of days, and it's finally gotten to that point where I can't really put it off anymore. Autumn has always been a favorite of mine, but I can honestly say that usually, I'm not particularly sad to see it go: snow means Christmas and Christmas means an end to exams and the beginning of a new year.

This year autumn has been a struggle for me. I found myself noticing the first tree on campus to change colours, and I can still remember where it is: the bush to the left, on the far side of the footbridge over the river. That was two weeks ago, and there are no leaves left on that bush. I tried to take advantage of my ability to be outside, I went on long walks and took myriads of pictures for no reason. But I can't let it go this time. This summer was too wonderful and amazing to be able to embrace the fact that it's over. Time has been going really quickly for me the last few months, but as soon as the snow hits the ground the world turns a little slower. And with the world turning slower, I can't spend all of my time wishing for next summer.

It snowed last night.

It didn't stay of course, but my heart dropped to my toes and the realization came that I couldn't waste my time resisting something that is so utterly out of my control. Now I'm left feeling bereft, not a little be sad, and apathetic to everything I have to do in the near future.

Missed a step...

2005-10-16T00:20:00.000-05:00

So apparently I missed out on something very important during my childhood. Now, once I've explained, it may seem just like another excuse for drawing on yourself, but Kate assures me it's ever so much more than that.

So now Kate will demonstrate for us. I won't quite call her Vana White, because all you can see is her hand, and she was grossed out after she saw the pictures and said her thumb and the meat of her hand look like a chicken leg. But she's the closest thing I've got.

When you read this you've got to picture someone doing it in a very kid-type way. You know -- that look you get when you're a kid and you're showing another kid a neat trick for the first time? You get that I'm-gonna-do-this- really-fast-and-superior-to-you tone of voice and/or facial expression. So imagine that while you read this. Or you could even read it aloud yourself! whee!

If you didn't get that, the thing you are saying along with the hand-gestures is "this is his face, his face is SMUSHED!"

Clever, huh?

Now all I have to do is go try to wash this shit off of my hands...

A trip to the grocery store..

2005-10-15T15:45:00.000-05:00

I just spent huge amounts of money on food that better last me the rest of the semester. But it won't -- I just know it.

I bought stuff like yeast, and cardamom -- bad sign. It says to me "duck, you are stressing out over midterms. Therefore you feel like doing mad amounts of baking" and that would be a good strategy -- baking is good for the soul -- except for the fact that I will end up eating what I create, and that is not good for my waist. Also, time spent kneading bread is time that could have been spent reading Thoreau. Ah, the dilemma. Ah well, I will compromise by reading Thoreau... while my bread is rising.

2005-10-12T22:27:00.000-05:00

Ahahaha!

2005-10-11T19:13:00.000-05:00

So, I sent in that rant about smoking into the school paper, The Argus and they published it! ahahahahahah!

I can't believe it, its too funny.

Of course.. they edited some bits out. Like me accusing the admin. of being on drugs when they thought up the smoking rules.... but hey, s'all good. ha ha ha

What a mess..

2005-10-10T22:02:00.000-05:00

I really wish I had parents who didn't get their kicks by firing police reports at each other. This divorce could not come soon enough, let me tell you. Seperated for 6 years? We've all had enough. Emergency court session tomorrow, hopefully that will help get things in motion. This has got to stop.

A picture is worth a thousand words...

2005-10-09T22:45:00.000-05:00

Yeah, Happy Turkey day, people! Or, those people of you that are not Americain, anyway. And for those of you who are -- Happy Columbus Day! ( I don't know why he gets a day, just for making a wrong turn, but hey, maybe its just me.)

I spent my turkey day doing homework, although I did sleep in til 11, which was supppppppper nice. And then, we trekked over to Swiss Chalet, and had us some fake turkey (because it was chicken) dinners. Actually, I was the only one who had a fake turkey dinner. Kate had a wrap and Mriss had this loaf..thing.

It was really sad because my first plate got to me and was completely cold, and I had to send it back -- first time I've ever sent anything back at a restauraunt. I was reminded of Rhiannon's tragic experience at my farewell bash. But these people were nicer to me and brought me a whole new plate. Which, consequently, was SO hot, I burned the roof of my mouth, and got a blister. Which was GROSS. And of course I kept tonguing it until it burst, which was disgusting.

We all ate so much we wanted to hurl walking back, and Marissa forgot to go to the washroom before we left and had to do the "I have to pee walk" all the way home. It wasn't what I normally have, but it was still great.

Thanks guys.
xoxoxo
-the duck.

RIP

2005-10-07T22:53:00.000-05:00

So I did something slightly morbid today. I went to class this morning and it was a really clear, if cold, autumn morning. When I got out, I looked across the street and saw a spectacular burst of colour on a tree. The camera was grabbed, and I made my way to the Riverside cemetery. Pictures of the tree were taken, but I'm far more interested in the ones I took of the gravestones.

I haven't spent a lot of time in cemeteries - mostly because I know all of 2 people who are on that side of the pearly gates. It was odd though, I'd expected to feel very somber and maybe a little creeped out. It wasn't like that at all though. I mean, I wasn't running around humming "Hit me Baby One More Time" or anything, but it was just calm, relaxing, and insightful.

This was a gravestone that really intrigued me. All it says is "LOVELADY." No dates, no other names, nothing.

The stone is very impressive. I wonder what the story behind it is. I'm afraid I can't help imagining a romantic love story that ended tragically. Someone must have loved her, what happened? Maybe she died of consumption like Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rouge. Or maybe she was killed in a jealous rage by her husband, when he found out about her wild love affair with the ruggedly handsome gardener (who, of course, subsequently knocked off the husband for stealing his love away...)

This one gets to me because it's a child's grave, and it is my firm belief that no parent should have to outlive their child.
It was intruiging, otherwise, because of the moss and lichen growing slowly up the cherub's body, and covering the inscription.

The statuette is also, as you may have noticed, quite headless. To me that brings home the fact that these tributes to the dead are just as temporary as we are, although I suppose we like to imagine otherwise.

Alright, okay...

2005-10-06T13:32:00.000-05:00

So maybe I won't. The sun's come out, so I feel a little better. I mean - it's still raining, but if I pretend I'm a cat and sun on the light spot on my carpet then I can forget about mostly everything...

Fucking Nazi Profs

2005-10-06T09:56:00.000-05:00

Just bombed a midterm. Tom is currently unimpressed with me. Had a "female wellness exam" yesterday, it's been raining every day for a week, I'm fat, and I don't get any turkey on turkey day. Not that I need it. THIS SUCKS.

I'm going to go and drown myself in lake Tamblyn.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~

Dear The Argus,

2005-10-04T12:27:00.000-05:00

The hot issue on campus has been smoking for a while now, and I am most definitely not impressed with the situation as it stands. I am a third year Con-Ed non-smoking student living on campus, and the situation affects me a little more than I would like.

For a little re-cap: Administration pushed through a student referendum at the end of my first year, to ask whether the campus should become a non-smoking one. The results came out (among much grumbling and accusations of a deliberate trick question,) that the following year the campus would be completely smoke free. Next year rolled around and people were smoking as usual -- half the people didn't know, half the people didn't care. When the rule started being enforced, people began smoking on the sly -- staff included. (Don't think that those of you who smoked in the bushes behind Keewatin went unobserved!) In response to the general outcry, this year Administration has introduced a compromise: labeled smoking areas.

Now, I don't know how these smoking-areas are working out for the smokers, and I am not about to risk lung cancer to go into one and ask, but I for one am not too impressed. For the most part people are using them, which comes as a surprise. However, I don't imagine the smokers will be too delighted to be using them when come winter, as the smoking-areas consist of blocks of cement arranged together in a square and offer no protection against inclement weather.

As for me, I object to them because of where they are placed. I don't know who had the bright idea of putting the smoking-areas along all the major walkways on campus, (or what they were on at the time,) but it is unappreciated. I understand that it probably encourages the smokers to actually use the areas, but it exposes non-smokers to more smoke than ever. It used to be that every time I walked to class, I would pass by one or two smokers, hold my breath for a second, and move on. This year, I get to walk by a smoking area where many smokers will sit smoking simultaneously, together creating a carcinogenic cloud around them that I estimate to be about a block high and wide.

And this is supposed to be an improvement?

Please, I implore you: Either make only the buildings on campus smoke-free, ban smoking on campus altogether and make people hide in the bushes again, or build actual (air-tight!) shelters for the smokers. Not only to protect the smokers from the weather but the non-smokers from the smoke - which was the goal in the first place, right?

Respectfully yours,
--The duck

Too funny

2005-10-03T08:42:00.000-05:00

wha?

2005-10-02T16:30:00.000-05:00

Apparently, Xena Warrior Princess had a pretty big effect on somebody... Who'd have thought?

Neptune, Pluto... Xena and Gabrielle?

Real-Tv

2005-10-01T22:43:00.000-05:00

Once again, I am sitting at home on a Saturday night, having watched Aladdin and played Scrabble.

Isn't my life scintillating?

Well, at least I was using my creative powers. While Kate and I were lounging about today we thought of a brilliant new reality teevee show! It's going to be called "Kitchen Wars" and the goal of the game is to be able to clean the kitchen as fast as you can. Our team was called the "We'regonnawin!" team.

We practised team-dishwashing after supper, me washing, Kate drying and putting away. Kate was egging me on, but I broke under the pressure a few times, mostly with bouts of hysterical laughter, but also from the abuse she was hurling at me (don't criticize her, it had to be done, I was being leisurely, and this is all about speeeeeeeeeed!)

It was tough, I don't think many people could do it. Martha Stewart could be a judge, it could totally work, and we'd make a lot of money off of it too. Now if only I didn't consider Reality Tv to be completely idiotic, it could work. Wait a second, it will work because Reality TV is completely idiotic! How silly of me - thanks for being dumb, America!

2005-09-27T23:23:00.000-05:00

A post.. I promised a post. I even have one in mind but I don't particularly feel like writing when I've just spent the better part of my evening working on a paper that has currently gone .5 centimeters away from nowhere.

For want of a post that takes little to no effort, im going to list some things today that were disconcerting to me, in one way or another.

1. I had a Jean-Grey X-men type experience this morning in french class. Was not altogether pleasant and had me wishing I could take out everyone in the room, minus Kate. And possibly Amanda, although I didn't remember she was in the room at the time, partly due to mounting hysteria. When I say "Jean-Grey experience" I'm referring to the episodes she used to suffer, where her psychic defenses would crumble in a moment of weakness and she could hear everyone talking in her head, all at once. (wait.. Did she hear thoughts, or was she an empath? Or a little of both? Now im confused.)

Well, to understand my episode you have to understand the Ryan building, which is where they've sentenced English majors to spend 90% of their time. It is a tall brown building, which I have heard referred to as "the brown building of doom." It has no windows, very few exits out of the building, and harbours rats the size of poodles who can climb vertical walls (no jokes. I've seen one do it.)

So this morning I'm sitting in Stylistics and Composition, in a class the size of a shoebox, with 40 students and a teacher, and no windows. The teacher has us get together in pairs to work on a question in the textbook. Slowly but surely the noise level starts to rise, with everyone talking, and then yelling to try to be heard over all the talking, and it slowly escalates and escalates, and here I am trying to invert a question into the proper form to answer the question, and I start to freak out, Jean-Greying all over the place with the shaky hands and the teary eyes and blocking my ears and rocking back and forth looking for a way out.

It was pretty terrifying, and I don't think Kate was all that impressed.

2. Okay, so I've forgotten what I was going to write. Apparently I wasn't all that dicomfitted by this one. Or the next one. Damnit, I'm too tired and full of Emerson quotes to be able to do this.

I quit!

What's the opposite of a long-weekend?

2005-09-26T00:09:00.000-05:00

Now I know some of you have been looking for a post the last few days, and had to navigate away grumbling, but let me tell you, weekends that are a day long don't leave you much time to dawdle around on the internet.

For most of you, if I said: "saturday morning _______," you would fill in the blank with "cartoons" or "brunch" or "sex." I, unfortunately, have had to (against my will,) fill that blank in with "3 hour class from hell." Now, when you have to wake up that early on a saturday morning, all you want to do when you get back is go to sleep. For me, this was compounded by the fact that I got a phone call about an hour and 10 minutes before I had to wake up for class. So Saturday was pretty much shot to hell what with class, then napping, then mad house-cleaning, and leisurely procrastination. Sunday was spent reading Emerson's essay on Nature over and over again, trying to find a workable thesis that is neither too simple or ludicrously hard. I've yet to succeed, but the paper's not due 'til Thursday.

Now it's 6 minutes into Monday, and I've just finished up a wonderful game of online scrabble where I absolutely raped my buddy Andrew, with a 249-181 score. I have yet to read a play that is supposed to be read by 10 am, and I have no plans to do so. I will probably feel badly about it later, but for now I think I will just go to bed. I suppose I can promise a real post in the near future, as I am nearly certain the week will warrant much more procrastination.

ciao,
the duck.

Happy birthday ol' girl...

2005-09-22T09:28:00.000-05:00

Okay, so "old girl" may be stretching it a little, but it definately feels odd to have two decades under my belt, and this aging thing is just going to get weirder as we go.

I'm very excited for pizza and cheesecake, although I'd much rather have my gran's bundt cake to celebrate with.

Come to think of it, it was/is/will be shortly this blog's birthday...

*Enter Aside*

Aside: What, you're not going to check? You're just going to leave that vague sentence up there to confuse your readers?
Me: Well, I had planned on it, yes.
Aside: But you could just as easily open another window and look up the archives.
Me: Well yeah, but I'm lazy.
Aside: All it is is point and click -- look you've even got it bookmarked, I can practically do this using my psychic powers. Come on, do it --point and click.
Me: *sighs* No one's supposed to be able to make me do anything on my birthday, you know.
Aside: You really are young aren't you, to still believe that shit? You don't live with your parents anymore, little girl, welcome to the ~real~ world.
Me: You are mean Aside, now I know why Moo got rid of you. Look, the blog's birthday was September 19th, okay? Now get lost.
Aside: Hah. You just have no appreciation for an artistic temperment. So long duckie...

*Exit Aside*
...
*Sticks his head back in the door*

Aside: Oh, and by the way, happy birthday. hahaha

*slams the door and whistles away*

So um, yeah. That was pretty bizarre. I think Im going to go and make breakfast now.

Birthday breakfast, whoo! :)

Rain rain go away...

2005-09-19T08:15:00.000-05:00

"It's raining it's pouring, the old man is snoring...."

"If all the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops oh what a rain that would be...."

"Robin in the rain, what a saucy fellow, showers always make you gayyyy! Bet the worms are wishing you would stay at home, robin on a rainy dayy!"

"Rain, rain, go away, come again some other day..."

"...Down came the rain and washed the spider out..."

I feel like a crazy person. I look out the window this morning and it's pouring rain. Immediately after the gut- reactions: "fuck!" and "damn if i'm going to blowdry my hair this morning," childrens songs start playing in my head. At first they go nice and slow, and I indulge in a little nostalgia while in the shower, but then they start playing faster and faster and faster all together and its a big mess. I hate that humans are incapable of truly linear thought -- it would made things so much more comprehensive. And I would feel less like I belonged in a mental institution.

The funny thing about rain in Thunder Bay is that no-one is prepared for it. I own an umbrella -- but did I bother to take it to school with me? No, its in Guelph, a plane-ride away. And no one else here owns one either, so we are all reduced to wearing our winter coats because they are the closest things we have to waterproof jackets. It's really amusing to see people wandering around in winter coats when it's 13 degrees out.

uh oh.

2005-09-17T15:20:00.000-05:00

I'mmmmmmmmmm in trouble...
I can't remember how to work!

cough cough

2005-09-17T10:10:00.000-05:00

waking up early on my saturday for rez volleyball only to find that your team consits of two people, and that the other team doesn't show up late, and their team consists of two people, thereby taking away our defalt-win, Sucks. Oh, but then we kicked their ASSES on 3 on 3. Go us, for not being afraid of the ball.

La fin.

2005-09-16T21:25:00.000-05:00

Okay, I totally deserve a saturday. yeuch.

School is just such a mess. A busy, expensive, frustrating mess. I can hardly wrap my head around being in school again. Somehow I skipped the transition part where I start thinking again a few weeks before school starts so that I can get on without looking like a complete prat. You know, those weeks where your mum used to say:

"alright, school is starting soon, I want you and your sister to start going to bed early, waking up earlier in the mornings and doing some preparation homework, to get you all psyched up for the schoolyear."

I mean, you never did any of those things, but you talked about it, you whined, finagled, and tantrumed your way out of it, but it got you thinking about school all the same. Parents are sneaky that way.

Textbooks this semester are ridiculous, 400 dollars -- when added it up I wanted to cry. One of them I'm really bitter about. It's for an education elective, and right away any Con Ed student at LU would perk up with a "wtf?" raised-eyebrow look because they don't usually assign textbooks to those courses for two very good reasons:

1. The Ed electives are worth a quarter credit. yep, they give out quarter credits, I didnt know that either.
2. They are only 9 weeks long, because proffessional year students go into placements after that.

So getting a textbook for a class with those special-circumstances is unfair and usually the profs are nice enough to realize and accomodate students by not assigning texts. Then I look at the price tag and the fucker is 85 dollars! Add to the fact that we're not using the textbook in class we're just expected to read the material in order to be tested on it!!! On top of that, the workload is about equivalent of a very work-intensive full semester course, if not a regular full year one. So I am pissed. P-i-s-s-e-d. Note the capital 'P.'

And of course all the profs have had their meeting where they decide which weeks to bury us in mountains of work. That's right, they get together to decide exactly when to assign all the tests, essays, and group-work in the same block of time, just to fuck with us. I know this because I've walked in on one of their sinister meetings - but that is a tale for another time, since I need time to make up a good story and maybe add some funky sound-effects.

But tomorrow is my one day of weekend. I get to play volleyball, go to the mall and just generally fuck around.

(Sorry about the vulgarity in this post, it just keeps spewing out, and I figure it's cleansing or something.)

I look forward to it.

current music: Go away, SR-71

Yay

2005-09-16T18:28:00.000-05:00

Kate made me feel better by discovering that tetris only goes up to level 1o, with a bonus level 11. haha. I rock and I didn't even know it. yes!

Ahhh...

2005-09-14T09:29:00.000-05:00

You know those mornings? Those fabulous mornings that you get once in awhile, where you wake up slow, take a good stretch, sing in the shower, sing out of the shower, and generally feel geat?

Well, I am having my morning, and it's pretty wonderful. I'm hoping the buzz will last through class, but I think that may be too much to ask for. But I got a good night's sleep, had a good morning, and I will have this post to remind me of it later.

plus: She's coming home today! *happy dance*

current music: Banana Pancakes, Jack Johnson (the ~perfect~ fabulous morning song)

Oh T.Bay, how I love thee...

2005-09-12T17:05:00.000-05:00

From	fakeadress@lakeheadu.ca
Sent	Monday, September 12, 2005 4:50 pm
To	notarealemail@lakeheadu.ca
Cc

SECURITY BULLETIN
September 12, 2005
- 1 item

BEAR ALERT
A black bear has been sighted frequently on campus over the past several days. This bear does not seem to be disturbed with people being around. It has been sighted around the Fieldhouse, Lake Tamblyn, Residence area, and by the Avila Centre.

A bear trap will be placed today or tomorrow in an attempt to remove the bear from campus. In the mean time please be BEAR AWARE. Walk with someone at all times. Do not approach the bear. Do not run from a bear - back away slowly. Make yourself look larger by raising your arms in the air and make noise. Make sure all garbage is placed in the garbage bins.

Report all bear sighting to Security at 343-8569 or call the sighting in by using the blue emergency telephones.
============================

To Please Rawkit:

2005-09-09T22:29:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm forcing myself to post something, even though I don't particularly feel like it. Rawkit wants something to do in her spare time, and since she's been checking the site 8 times a day since my last post, hoping I'd written something, (~anything!~) I thought that the least I could do would be to oblige her by doing what I do best: blathering on about nothing.

Yesterday was interesting, I spent far too much money again, mostly because printer ink costs the earth, and I got suckered into a sale at Bluenotes. Although, I am rather fond of the shirts I picked up. Both are graphic tees, nothing really special, but the one that caught my eye first is one for The Boy. I figure if he gets to dress up like a pirate on the plane, just to embarrass me, the least I can do is wear a shirt that says: "Everybody loves a Canadian Girl!" and get a maple leaf tattooed to my forehead. Or maybe only the first bit. -shh, it's a surprise!- The other shirt is fun too, and it says: "I (heart) Nerds" which is true, otherwise I wouldn't be going out with The Boy, whose pastimes include painting WarHammer (?) figurines, reading comics and playing videogames.

Yesterday classes started, and I finally got my schedule sorted out today. It involved dropping a course I'd really rather have kept, (Contemporary Fiction) to pick up another one in the fall (American Prose) that, at least, is being taught by a prof that I have had previously and enjoyed. Plus, since Rawkit got kicked out of her Creative Writing class because she's skipping school to go to the U2 concert, she's going to pick up the American Prose class too, and we're going to party together on Tuesday and Thursday evenings. And Monday mornings. And Tuesday mornings. Oh -- and Thursday mornings. Yeah, my best friend is in all but two of my classes. Handy, that. We're going to raise a little hell, mouahaha. Okay, well, we'll probably just sit demurely and take copious notes and then later on badmouth the Profs behind their backs. But it's all the same to us. ;)

I'm getting sleepy since I had a rough night last night, but I'm scared to go to sleep because of the nightmare I had. It was really bizarre, and started out really nice, with me babysitting some kids I fabricated, and going swimming with the dolphins, until it just turned really bad. There was this dolphin whose dorsal fin I was hanging on to, (like the marine trainers at Marineland do, and that kid in Free Willy!) and he was pulling this little girl and I through the water, and we were having a blast -- but suddenly the dolphin shrank to the size of cat, and couldn't pull us anymore, so we had to let it go to save it from drowning, and we were too far underwater and had to get to the top, and I had to try to save this girl but I couldn't. After that I don't remember anything until I am in a bookstore with my mother, brothers, and stepfather, as well as our Real-Estate agent Trish (which is VERY strange, since I don't particularly care for her.) And Trish is showing us all books that she thinks my parents should get me, but I don't want them to because they cost too much money and I am feeling guilty about something I have done, even though the books are beautiful and I want them badly.

Then, the next thing I know I have caught my biological father doing something bad, and confront him and he gets into a car with a trailer on the back and makes a getaway -- but I chase him down the street, and he stops the car in the middle of the street and starts shouting horrible things to me. And there is this dog, (and this is beyond disgusting and I do not like admitting my subconscious is capable of this) laying on the street - it's a beautiful Golden Retriever and it's been completely gutted, and my father picks up pieces of this dog that is lying all bloody and dead on the street and starts throwing them at me as he's yelling... And then I woke up.

Needless to say I felt pretty wretched when I woke up, and almost called The Boy, even though it was nearly 4:30am where he was, but I decided I could weather it on my own. I feel almost compelled to search for the meaning of the dream, but even though I don't put too much stock in that kind of thing, I don't think I really want to know anyway, it seems pretty horrible. Martin says he just tries to remember the feelings he has during dreams, and that gives a better picture of what is happening than having an owl or something in your dream and looking up "owl" in a dream dictionary or something. I think its petty clear that the feelings in the dream were fairly negative. Anyway, I don't think they will have an entry for "decimated Golden Retrievers."

On that note, I think I need a piece of chocolate.

Summer is officially dead

2005-09-07T21:44:00.000-05:00

Wow, it's gone -- summer's gone!

It slipped by without me stopping to take a second glance. Tomorrow school starts up again, and it feels like I never left to begin with. This summer was great, and I owe it to a lot of things, but mostly I owe it to the people around me, at work and at home -- they were the ones who made this summer the one I will always remember. Time's ticking guys, and next thing you know I will be 24, newly graduated, and a full-fledged member of the adult-club. It's an odd revelation, when you come to realize that something you've always been waiting for is going to happen, and furthermore, its going to happen soon. It's like this gift you've been handed but you don't know whether or not you want to accept it, because doing so would be admitting that tomorrow won't be your birthday anymore.

Am I ready? Probably not. But I'm going to go at it with a smile on my face and my dukes up, just in case. I'll be fine.

omigodomigodomigodomigod!!!!!!

2005-09-06T11:47:00.000-05:00

SHhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Something is VERY wrong with my camera! *sob*
You know, my brand new, very expensive, very un-warrantied digital camera!

I put new batteries in, and nothing happened --it didn't turn on, but the little metal piece on the bottom got very very very hot! THIS CANNOT BE GOOD!

omigodomigodomigodomigod!
im going to go drown myself now.

2005-09-05T13:00:00.000-05:00

So, I'm currently ~not~ tubing, and I'm absolutely ecstaticly dopey-happy about it. The Boy suprised me and called me back around 1am and we talked until after 4, so I wasn't up for the early morning departure time. That's ok though, the phone call was definately worth it. And now I get a whole day minus volunteer responsibilities, so I'm going to pick up another one of those books for my 18th Century Lit class, go outside and hopefully get that done.

Catch-up

2005-09-04T23:53:00.000-05:00

Well, I've finally heard from The Boy who has been incommunicado because of internet/phoneline connection problems at his new place. Apparently he went through quite a bit trying to get a hold of me, too -- he ended up calling my mother to find the number that he'd lost and Bob didn't remember he had. Apparently my mother and he had a nice little chat, (god help me) and although she had to rush off to visit my grandfather, who is currently in the hospital (it's wrong of me to be thankful she had to go, isnt it?) She wants him to call her back, which I have forbidden him to do, so there is about a 75% chance he will, just to spite me. However, it would mean awkwardness for him, so I have that hope, at least.

He's fine, school's started, so he's back in a routine. He says with all the late nights/mornings we had, he didn't even have to re-adjust to the time-difference because he never really got on Canada time. I find it funny that I'm the one who has to painfully pull myself out of bed in the morning because I slept in til noon for 2 weeks, and he gets off scot-free, even though he was the traveller.

He laughed at me when I told him I put on his shirt and cried myself to sleep after he left. The jerk. Ah well, he likes to harrass me, and it was kinda pathetic. At least he admitted he missed me -- he doesn't like to admit he has feelings unless it suits him.

Anyway, its midnight and I have another one of those early mornings tomorrow, so I'm off to bed.

Insert Tetris Theme Here

2005-09-04T20:12:00.000-05:00

Man, there is something very wrong with me. I have become obsessed with this online version of Tetris. At first I couldn't get past level 9, and now that I finally have, I can't get past level 10. I mean, it's pure insanity, there is no point even trying because as soon as you get to level ten, even is you have one line not finished at the very bottom of the screen, you are going to have 9 pieces blocking your way in the .3 seconds it takes the ALL to get the bottom of the screen.

It's just not humanly possible.

And yet, for some reason, I find myself going to level one and starting all over again to see if, maybe, this time, I will be able to get to level 11. I'm thinking psychiatric evaluation might be a good idea at this point.

Volunteered again this morning, and again tonight, selling tickets for the tubing thingy tomorrow, and Orientation kits. I don't mind -- since I created the system, I can work with the system, and it's all good. If they had me hauling garbage bags or touring people around campus 8 hours a day, I might get annoyed, but selling stuff? I can handle that.

Also today I have managed to get through one of the novels I need to read once school starts. Now I only have 9 more novels 4 plays and a few short stories to get through, besides the textbooks. And this is only the fall semester.

I am excited for tonight, because I finally get to see Mr. & Mrs. Smith, which is what they are playing at the outdoor movie where I am going to be selling tickets. I've wanted to see that since it came out, ages ago. Once I even made it to the theatre with Elise, but we were 40 minutes late for the show because I guess the site I used to check the time had a typo. I am also excited for tomorrow, tubing should be great, especially if Kerri and Chris come, so I won't have to float alone. At first I was scared about how cold it was going to be, (especially since I woke up this morning at 6, clutching the blankets to myself and seriously thinking about turning the heat on, and then when I woke up for good at 8, it was 5 degrees outside) but they're calling for a high of 29, so that's not bad, not bad at all.

I should really go and eat something, because I haven't yet, and it's after 8. But I keep going down to make myself something and then get down there and decide I'm not hungry after all and go right back up and play another round of Tetris. It's probably laziness, is what. Maybe I should go try and take care of that.

PS-- sorry, I felt like messing with colours.

Weirdism

2005-09-03T18:46:00.000-05:00

The craaaaaaaziest thing has just happened. Anyone remember my roomate last year, who was from Finlandia? We called her Olga and didn't get along with her all that well. We all thought she had gone back to Finlandia, never to be seen again -- well, think again. Yesterday I'm wandering around campus when who do I spy but Olga herself! And not only Olga, but her creepy newfie boyfriend from last year, who she started going out with 3 weeks before she let, and then re-arranged her flight to go meet his parents before she went back to Finlandia. Quite beside myself, I plaster the biggest smile on my face and go up to her

thinking: Holy shit! She's back from Hell-sinki! (bad pun, sorry.)
me: Olga! Holy shit! How are you?!
O : Great, how are you?
: I'd be better if you were in Finland you bitch
me: I'm really good, how come you're back?
O: Well, I didn't know I would be back until this summer actually.
: You always were a slow one.
me: Oh? Well that's great, I never thought I would see you again!
: if I only I'd never had to...
O: *twitters*
me: So, where are you living?
: Who the fuck twitters? Please let it not be next door...
O: Over in phase two this year, actually.
me: Ahh, well that's cool.
: Too bad it isn't further.
newfie: *coughs*
me: Oh, I'm sorry, I don't remember your name.
: I wouldn't waste the brain cells required..
newfie: oh, yeah, I'm Steve* (I could be wrong, wasn't paying too much attention)
: Can I call you the Creepy Newfie Guy, instead? Don't try to shake my hand you C-N-G, hands off!
me: Well, uh....... *awkward pause*
: Shit, I've run out of things to say, do I pull out Harry Potter, the Hurricane or just make a break for it?
me: Anyway, I'm sorry to have interupted your walk... I'll just... go now.

And then I ran away. Weird, huh? Just one of those things that makes you stop and stare. Aww, it's nearly 7 -- I have to go back and finish volunteering now, I had a break for a few hours, but I'm off to work again. Oh -- and by the way, I eventually remembered why I volunteer: new people and free stuff. woot!

Volunteer turns to Volun-told.

2005-09-01T23:23:00.000-05:00

Man, why do I do this stuff to myself? I mean I know the theory to Volunteering with orientation was to stave off boredom... but I never get bored! There's always something to do! Probably because I waste my time volunteering for people who A) Don't appreciate it and B) Dump everything they can on the poor volunteer who obviously wanted to be dumped on without recognition. Blarg. Okay, and maybe I was trying to be mother Theresa and help the poor first years that step off the plane like I did, without the benefit of parentals and any clue about what to do with themselves. But... who cares about them, really!? I muddled through just fine, didn't I? (with the help of a friendly RA....)

They basically signed me up for every shift that other people weaseled out of at the last minute. The plan was to keep myself busy for a couple hours this week, not getting up at 830am every day this week and also not having to find a couple spare minutes to myself to buy my freaking school books. *le sigh*

In other news: do NOT go to see Bewitched, it is soo wrong. Nicole Kidman pretending to be Meg Ryan prentending to be Samatha. And Will Ferrell. Don't even get me started on him. Complete waste of time. On the upside though, I only payed four dollars to see it at this discount cinema I discovered with Kerri, circa the 1800's. Pretty awesome.

Now to sleep, to dream... because I have to get up at an ungodly hour. yeesh.

So there, Lena!

2005-08-31T20:05:00.000-05:00

Man, I just got so distracted by tetris that my cereal went soggy. That's not cool.

This post is a 'so-there' post, where I get to dance around giddily because I did something someone told me I couldn't. Lena said I was too shy to go and talk to the boys next door, and I said I wasn't and I just proved it by metting a bagillion engineers. And learning lots of things from all of them:

There was Jamal, and Andrew, and Cody, and Matt, and Mike, and Zu, and Gord, and Wally. (And I wrote all those down just so that I will know for later.) Jamal is from Pickering, and wears his pants verrrrrry low. Andrew is from Winnipeg and ~wants~ the snow to come early. Cody is from BC and threw a bottle of whisky through his front window one time while he was drunk. Matt comes from kitchener and like Brand New. Mike is... well actually, I don't know much about him other than his prof asked him why he wasn't chinese even though his last name is Lang. Zu is from Tanzania and likes to play frisbee. Gord was drunk off his ass and thinks my mom would be fun to take out. Wally was from Germany and had an accent.

Tah Dah! I'll show YOU shy!

^_^

Jesus H. Chriist!

2005-08-31T11:40:00.000-05:00

Gas prices in Canada jump 20 cents overnight

CTV.ca News Staff

Motorists pulling up to the pumps this morning may be wishing they filled up yesterday, after prices jumped overnight by as much as 20 cents a litre.

In Toronto, the price of gasoline at some stations was about $1.24 a litre. And in Montreal, gas prices hit $1.15 a litre.

On the West Coast, prices hit $1.21 per litre in Vancouver. Even in oil-rich Alberta, gas prices in Edmonton hit $1.24 a litre.

Michael Kane of Report on Business Television said the higher prices at the pumps could be felt elsewhere, such as supermarkets.

"It has an inflationary effect in that so much of what we eat, for example, is transported by truck," Kane told Canada AM on Wednesday.

Large companies that use trucks to transport food will pass along the higher cost of gas to consumers.

"In your grocery stores, pretty soon you'll start seeing signs going up around the vegetable section saying 'Due to recent weather problems, there are very few shipments of' whatever we get from the United States."

And that ripple effect they're talking about? Yeah, well I live in THUNDER BAY, groceries already cost more here because all of them need to be trucked in from so far away. Oh man, oh man, my budget is in teh trouble. Shit. Over a dollar for 4 CUPS worth of gasoline? I mean, the Americans are whining about it ~almost~ being 3 dollars -- but they sell it by the GALLON. Dude -- this isn't even our friggin war! I'm going to go and cry now.

No Effing Way

2005-08-30T22:07:00.000-05:00

Now is not a good time to be studying to become a teacher.

"U.K. school tailors policy to foul mouths

Students can use 'f-word' up to 5 times per lesson"

"According to a report in the U.K.Âs Daily Mail, one school in the town of Wellingborough is allowing pupils to swear at teachers, providing they only do so no more than five times in a class. A tally of how many times the f-word is used will be kept and if the class exceeds the limit, they will be ÂspokenÂ to, the newspaper reported."

"Within each lesson the teacher will initially tolerate (although not condone) the use of the f-word (or derivatives) five times and these will be tallied on the board so all students can see the running score,"

"[They] also reported that the 1,130-pupil school plans to send Âpraise postcardsÂ to the parents of children who do not swear and who turn up on time for lessons."

The whole thing is ludicrous! I'm speechless, it's just incredible. What are they going to do if students start swearing AT the teacher? That's abuse in the workplace -- teachers already take too much shit as it is. This is disgusting. I need some chocolate, and I also need to rethink my career. Or at least, go teach in some country where it's still legal to beat your pupils.... mouahahaha.

2005-08-29T21:54:00.000-05:00

I suppose it's wrong of me to find this incredibly amusing, huh?

But they also have a point.....

Trendwhore Bracelets

Weird dreams and a cramped neck

2005-08-29T00:16:00.000-05:00

OH boy. I was supposed to get up at 10, and its 12. blarg. I also had the most effed up dreams last night- its unbelievable. Now, whoever's heard me trying to explain a dream I've had to them will know that what comes next will be largely incoherent (whoa, like most of my writing! Only worse.) with large gaps that I can't remember or connect to different parts of the dream.

Now first of all, my dream begins in my grandmamman's house, which I haven't seen in a year and is 8 hours away from Guelph. There are a lot of people there, only it isn't family, like it usually is, but its alll sorts of people I know from Guelph and we're practicing for a play/musical which involves, in the first scene, a mad looking old lady coming in screaming "the fire's gone out, the fire's gone out!" So we all run down to the firepit or whatever (the den, and it has seen better days) and there are glowing coals ALL over the den floor, and there is this huge hearth taking up one wall. So I pick up a piece of flat board and start waving it at the coals in hopes that it will light again.

Then all the sudden I'm in the bathroom (having given up on the fire, apparently) and I'm having the worst hair day imaginable, and I'm just untangling and untangling my hair when my father calls from upstairs. So I go out and everyone is getting ready to leave. And they are all like "so you coming? We're going over to Ross (my old highschool) to play some somethingorother." I blink and go "play what?" and they're all like "oh, it's like soccer, but instead of a ball, there's a rock" So I say yeah, I want to go, but wait a minute, so I run down to the bathroom again and shove my hair up, go outside and yell that I only have enough room for 3 people in the truck (which is Martin's and clearly not Marc's so what its doing there, I don't know) and does everyone fit in Tory's Van and who-ever's car? They do, and Corey, Parker and some blank-faced person end up in the Truck with me, that Corey is driving for some reason. (which is made more weird by the fact that I have never been in a vehicle Corey has been driving.)

And then I forget something and have to run in again, and Marc is wearing mittens from like, the 2nd grade (you know, those red wool ones with the string in the middle to keep them from getting lost?) and he says grandmamman doesn't need them because she says they are too floppy. AND THEN HE HANDS ME A JOINT! And I was all like, "dad, what the hell am I supposed to do with this?" and he's like, "what, do you need another one?" and I'm just like "No!!" And I run back out to the truck and we drive away. Then I realize I forgot my camera, and Corey and I have this big debate to turn around or not, which we don't.

And that's the end of that. Except for this one random (I really do say that to excess..) part where I see a commercial for this new product that looks sortof like a smaller version of those jalapeno fairy lights, only these are blue, and they fit in your ears and vibrate and do some magical thing that makes you healthier for some reason.

The end.

So yeah..... what the fuck?

(And my neck REALLY hurts, so im going to try to beat it out with my shower-head.)

The Day after Hiroshima

2005-08-28T20:54:00.000-05:00

Well, I seem to have survived.

I guess I'm stronger than I thought. I needed the day to grieve, and its not like i'm walking around in insipid contentment -- but im okay. Now I just need to do some shopping... and some binge eating.... haha, just kidding.

What I actually need to do is get off my ass and wash the dishes and sweep the floor. But I don't wanna. And, since my roomates are all AWOL for awhile, I don't feel so bad about putting it off - athough I might need to buy a clean bowl if I want cereal tomorrow morning...

No, its tea and a good book for me.

Confessions of a great big Loser

2005-08-27T19:46:00.000-05:00

Ahh, pathetic fallacy, how I love thee.
I'm miserable, in case you couldn't tell.

It's a shame, after such a great couple of weeks, but then, I guess its all to be expected, isn't it? The Boy's been here for that long, you see. And for those of you who don't know -- The Boy is the guy who I'm very emotionally attached to right now. Also he is from Reno, Nevada -- exactly 2169.10 miles, 1 country and several states away (it varies depending on which way you go.) And yes, I met him on the internet. *gasp!*

Well, get over it, it happens, and I'm tired of apologizing or making excuses for it. If the cab driver from T.Bay Ontario can have a net girlfriend in Argentina (no jokes,) then I can have a boy from Reno. Now, its not like im saying that having a net boyfriend is a good idea either, because mostly, its not, and I'm lucky he wasn't an axe murderer or anything. Now, if you're realistic you'll know that long distance relationships don't work. And I know. All that's left to determine is whether 2 weeks of bliss (maybe that's the wrong word) is worth the subsequent pain of separation.

We had a blast, rented a car, did day trips, got lost, dropped car-keys down waterfalls, watched countless movies, played in the rain, shared stories, I cooked, he read to me, played table tennis, video games and real-life mortal combat (where I got slapped around a whole lot more than he did -- but he was ticklish: so I cheated.)

And now he's gone.

It's probably melodramatic of me to be wondering if it's my bad-karma from a past life that has me living so far away from a guy I could get very comfortable with, but that's the way my mind is leaning right now. He's been gone 11 hours now, and although I 'm no longer in tears I am wearing a shirt he forgot that still smells like him (how cliched) and thinking about him non-stop. And worse, I have no idea what to do with myself. I normally have no problems being alone - hell, usually I relish it. But the house is so empty, and I cant bring myself to do anything.

even finish this post...

How Evil are You??

2005-08-25T20:03:00.000-05:00

It's weird, realizing, suddenly, that you are a vile bitch sometimes, just like everybody else. I realised this awhile ago, and I'm learning to revel in it, when I feel reveling is appropriate.

Yesterday though, an example came along where reveling was SO not called for. I'm laying in bed reading with The Boy when a plane roars overhead in a not-so-good-sounding type of way. I look over at The Boy with wide-eyes and go -- I hope that plane's not in trouble -- to which he replies "don't be ridiculous." Then when sirens start screaming down the road, one after another, after another, I look up again and ask "Are you sure? It sounded kind of bad" but he scoffs at me, saying: "those sirens were too delayed to be for something that serious, stop worrying about it."

Then, when I hear through the open window the ambulance chasers who live in my complex gossiping about a plane crash through the open window, I get up and start a VICTORY DANCE, trilling:"I was right, I was right, you were wrong!" before realising what I was doing and stopping mid-song to put my hand over my mouth in shock.

Talk about desensitization.

My only consolation is that no one was hurt, the pilot ejected in time. What's really odd though, is that for some reason, The Boy enjoyed my bout with evil -- he was in stitches laughing. Especially later, when I was moved near-to-tears by the death of a character in the book I am currently reading, showing just how in-touch with reality I really am. It's odd what some people find attractive...

current music: Prologue, Loreena McKennit from Book of Secrets

random update

2005-08-21T18:33:00.000-05:00

Want to know what the most expensive hobby is?

You'd think it would be something like sky-diving, bungee-jumping or the collection of those tropical fish that cost like a trajillion dollars each. Really though - it's reading. You know, you can get 700 channels from Shaw for twenty bucks a month, but you go to a bookstore and pick up two books and you're out fifty bucks. No freaking wonder kids aren't reading, they're smart! -- I should have quit ages ago! Soon grandparents everywhere are going to be talking about books like they talk about cigarettes: You really shouldn't smoke/read you know, it's the little things, a pack/book a day will cost you a thousand dollars in no time, you really should just quit cold turkey.

Or you know, maybe its just me.

Things are going well right now, excellently well, actually. Nothing much is happening but that's okay -- all I have to complain about is the rain, and even that isn't so bad. It's weird being in Thunder Bay without Kate and Mriss, and it drives me nuts that Kate won't be here til mid-september. But, the cutie keeps sending me letters, so I can't realy figure I can complain. mm, I'm being distracted now.... people playing with my hair will do that. Gotta go!

2005-08-18T18:20:00.000-05:00

That's it -- it's above a dollar, and it's never ever coming down. This is the end of the good old days that we will tell our grandkids about, while they stare at us with incredulous eyes...

The Boy and his Frog.

2005-08-13T08:39:00.000-05:00

Something Positive does it again. See http://www.tomsmithonline.com/presskit/audio.htm
The song is titled "The Boy and his Frog"